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June 17th, 2015
Today on WJ

5AM (1):

-    Donald Trump wants Oprah as his running mate in the 2016 Presidential Election.
-    How many speedboats can you buy for $100 million? Hillary Clinton would know…
-    Perhaps the US should adopt the European Parliament system.

5AM (2):

-    There are quite a few twigs and leaves on the road this morning, but Houston will rebuild after tropical storm Bill.
-    How can you trust television with all the political spin and lies about weather? Do they not know we’re laughing at them?
-    Donald Trump’s first job should be to fire The Pope.

6AM (1):

-    Hillary has a few ideas on how to make the economy work. Question is: is she indicating that Barack hasn’t done a sufficient job?
-    According to reports, the St. Louis Cardinals hacked into the Astros computer system.

6AM (2):

-    An ex-Ravens cheerleader has just pleaded guilty to 4th degree rape of a 15-year-old boy.
-    An Alabama man had sex with a male shitzu dog.
-    Michelle Obama is visiting London. Meanwhile, the President is stuffing his face with cheeseburgers in the White House kitchen.
-    Is Oprah too tight with her money to act as Vice President?

6AM (3):

-    Another benefit of Donald Trump running for President is that he can get us on Brett Michael’s party bus.
-    Audio: Rachel Dolezal claims she’s black
-    Parody: Rachel Dolezal is a black honky woman

6AM (4):

-    Parody: Charles Barkley wants to congratulate the Golden State Warriors
-    A man went into TJ Max store and started pleasuring himself with the clothes. When all was said and done, he ‘damaged’ 10 t-shirts.
-    Mr. Eaux will vote for Donald Trump simply because of Ivanka.

7AM (1)

-    Parody: Shirley Q thinks everyone looks orange these days
-    This day in history
-    Turns out Donald Trump supports some gun control.
-    Audio: Jeb Bush slow jammed the news

7AM (2):

-    Audio: This day in history – OJ Simpson’s car chase
-    Who did the Bronco actually belong to?

7AM (3):

-    Taser Report

7AM (4):

-    Audio: Don Trump will be the best President known to man
-    Audio: Hank Hill might be an even better President than Donald Trump
-    Would you believe that a kid named “Blanket” gets bullied?
-    Let’s be honest: There is no Michael Jackson blood in the Jackson kids.

8AM (1):

-    Parody: Where are white people disappearing to?
-    This day in history
-    5 tips on buying sunglasses – bigger is better according to one article

8AM (2):

-    Who knew there’s a hidden beat box scene Forrest Gump?

8AM (3):

-    Hollywood thinks we need more hip hop movies.
-    Parody: High drama at the Houston Astros office as the St. Louis Cardinals hack the system
-    Why is Whoopie Goldberg still on television?

8AM (4):

-    What’s the best way to eradicate wild hogs?
-    This day in history
-    We want to eat healthy just like the next person, but we don’t want the government to tell us what to eat.

9AM (1):

-    Celebrity Birthdays
-    Detroit used to be one of the whitest cities in the nation. Now, of course, the landscape is much different.
-    This day in history – OJ Simpson raced through the streets of California in his Bronco
-    Sad news about John Hurt – He has early stage pancreatic cancer
-    Neil Young doesn’t like Donald Trump, but are we surprised?
-    What would a fight between Ted Nugent and Neil Young look like? That would be hardcore paper view material right there!

9AM (2):

-    Emails – As a Catholic, Jake wants to apologize for the fact that The Pope has placed himself in between major political matters.
-    Cops in Kenner say a woman and her husband left their 24-year-old disabled daughter in a hot car while they gambled for four hours in a casino.
-    Are you a winner at all when you win in a ‘loser bracket?’

9AM (3):

-    When Sally Ride went to space she had to decide if 100 tampons were enough for her ‘consumption.’
-    Random Fact: It’s illegal to pretend to practice witchcraft in Canada.
-    It’s not illegal to have sex with a dog in Alabama.
-    Bill Murray is suspicious of people that don’t like dogs.

9AM (4):

-    The nickname for Jeb Bush should be Mitt McCain.
-    Emails
-    Hillary has been awarded a “liberty medal” for her work overseas.



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