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May 14th, 2015
Today on WJ

5AM (1):

-         No one could have predicted the fact that the only way to get honest news was a couple of shock jocks. What does that say about our media outlets?

-         Leave it to the Democrats to run to the media and claim that the cause of the Amtrak crash in Philadelphia was caused by the Republicans. 

5AM (2):

-         Who’s more at fault for the Amtrak crash: the train engineer or the Democrats that refuse to take responsibility?


6AM (1):


-         The Disney Corporation is caught up in a lip-syncing scandal. We’re not sure about you, but this really puts the whole nuclear situation in North Korea on the back burner.

-         Johnny Depp is currently filming the sixth iteration of Pirates of the Caribbean

-         If Hillary Clinton doesn’t have to produce any emails, why should Tom Brady have to?


6AM (2):


-         Only in Texas can you have a Longhorn stampede in your front yard.

-         If you were Rand Paul’s barber would you save all the fine lamb’s hair you cut off?

-         Don Trump would probably give millions to have hair like Rand Paul.


6AM (3):


-         If you think the W&J app has problems, try the Starbucks app. According to reports, the Starbucks app has major security issues that may cause your credit card information to be broadcast over WiFi.

-         The city of Boston is still struggling with whether or not to execute the Boston bomber.

-         Does Rand Paul cut his own hair? Some sources indicate this may be the case.


6AM (4):


-         If you run on a treadmill you should know that running with no incline is worse for your knees that running on pavement. Research indicates that you should use at least a 2 percent grade.

-         A day doesn’t go by where a ‘man in Florida’ story comes up that’s worth discussing.





7AM (1)


-         Parody: The NSA is always there, even in the most heartfelt moments.

-         Parody: For just 12 cents a day you can help ease Tom Brady’s suffering. Have a heart; pledge now.

-         A new study from Microsoft indicates that the attention span of the average of American is now just 8 seconds. 10 years ago the average attention span was closer to 20 seconds.

-         Billy Ed proposes that Mother’s Day should be changed to encompass the entire weekend.


7AM (2):


-         Audio: Is the Star Wars series racist?

-         There are fewer people that love America than ever.

-         America is filled with an ‘offense industry’ – people waiting to be offended.

-         Mr. Kenneth might be the only one excited to be in possession of Tom Brady’s zip code.


7AM (3):


-         Just as we predicted, the news media is questioning the “infrastructure” of Philadelphia rather than the train engineer himself.

-         Parody: The plan to cut Amtrak funding worked out great

-         How many capes do you own?


7AM (4):


-         Parody: W&J present “Things that white people say”

-         Does the decline in Christianity have anything to do with the preponderance of rap music?

-         A group of University students are seeking to have the degree of a Republican revoked simply because he disagrees with global warming.




















8AM (1):


-         Two Florida hearse drivers have been terminated after taking a coffee break at a Duncan Donuts before the precession.

-         Street Audio: Producer Ken asks some hot button questions about what it takes to be a Mayor in Houston.


8AM (2):


-         Have you seen theJem trailer? Bill Shatner did and wasn’t pleased.

-         How will the producers of Mad Men wrap up the show in just an hour?


8AM (3):


-         An Oklahoma man killed his stepfather during the process of giving him an atomic wedgie. This headline places Oklahoma in the same league as Florida for the most bizarre stories.

-         A woman is Australia has started a break-up service for just $5 a text.

-         A group of liberals wants to replace the face of Andrew Jackson on the twenty dollar bill with Harriet Tubman.


8AM (4):


-         Vin Diesel is practically black according to him.

-         Living in America is like growing up in a home with abusive parents.















9AM (1):


-         Celebrity birthdays


9AM (2):


-         We take you to Beaverton, Oregon where the city is requiring strip clubs to only hire strippers without criminal backgrounds. Not sure about you, but when we go to our local strip joints we expect our lap dances to be performed by a girl with a record.

-         In Hattiesburg, many businesses are giving away free blue light bulbs and ribbons to show their support for the police. The media, of course, isn’t showing you this.

-         Vienna, Austria has unveiled their new ‘gay friendly’ street crossing lights.

-         Bush’s chicken paid us a visit today. 


9AM (3):


-         Let’s take a moment to address the stupidity of Americans: Have you heard of “Rent a Coup?” According to a report, the company helps those wishing to own a chicken but not harness the responsibilities that come with it.


9AM (4):


-         Do you have a finger that you refer to as your “love finger?”

-         Calls – Seth in Utah loves the app and doesn’t think anyone has the right to complain about it!

-         A professor of African American studies at Boston University has been posting about her hatred of Caucasian men all over social media. If this were to have come from a white professor, he or she would have been fired.





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