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March 20th, 2015
Today on WJ

5AM (1):

-         While other morning shows are covering the latest celebrity news, we’re the only ones talking about the potential of WWIII starting.

-         Inconvenient truth: Democrats were the ones that passed the Jim Crow laws, not Republicans.

5AM (2):

-         Even back in the day, Barry Goldwater was considered radical.

-         Today is a freaky Friday: There’s a total solar eclipse occurring over Iceland right now and today is the vernal equinox.

6AM (1):

-         In Mississippi, a black man was found hanging from a tree. Was this a suicide or a hate crime?

-         Why is it that writers are typically inept at public speaking?

-         Audio: Who’d of thought that a feminist NY Times writer despises Hillary Clinton?

-         If you have the W&J app you can catch up on previous shows.

-         Oprah is auctioning off furniture from her Chicago apartment. Does this include Steadman?

6AM (2):

 

-         A fake NYC gun store opened for the purpose of shaming potential gun buyers.

6AM (3):

-         5 Random Facts

-         According to big-hat wearing Pharrell, cases like the recent Sam Smith lawsuit will “kill future musical creativity.”


6AM (4):


-         George Prescott Bush is looking for a new manager of the Alamo.

-         Parody: Alamo Land Management signs the Mi Familia Company to manage the property.

-         Is Mr. Eaux starting his memoirs?

 

7AM (1)

 

-         Stevie Wonder is in town tonight.

-         A 20-year-old Chinese man named “Wu” in broke up with his girlfriend only to start dating another girl. The story gets complicated after both girls jumped into a river to see which one he would save.


7AM (2):

 

-         Audio: Mr. T is launching a show on HGTV called “I Pity the Tool”

-         Emails

-         Didn’t Stevie Wonder say that he would never play in a state that doesn’t support gun control? Turns out that money makes everyone a hypocrite.


7AM (3):


-         Parody: Try Tinger – the dating site exclusively for gingers.

-         None of us would fare well in prison.

-         Emails – Listener Mike won’t be going to the Stevie Wonder concert because he’s such a hypocrite.

 

7AM (4):

 

-         Audio: Georgia State coach Ron Hunter fell out of his chair celebrating his son’s shot at the Baylor game.

-         According to Forbes, Texas is the best place to retire.

 

8AM (1):

-         Audio: Every once in a while a viral sports phrase is created. How about the phrase “wham sauced”

-         When you think of an overcrowded train crash, what country comes to mind?

-         Tragedy in India

-         Remember the homemade style chili you could get at little league games?

8AM (2):


-         Parody: There are some things in life that money can’t buy, for everything else, just use your EBT card.

-         Democrat Dick Durban accused Republicans of putting Loretta Lynch in the “back of the bus”

-         The new sports phrase “wham sauced” may replace the age-old standard “boo ya!”


8AM (3):

 

-         What kinds of questions are deemed inappropriate for an interview? What about “what was your favorite ‘90s jam?”

-         New versions of Monopoly are available featuring specific cities and landmarks.


8AM (4):


-         Calls – Seth, an SAE frat leader was accused of racism by the Houston Chronicle

-         Used to be that the Houston Chronicle was a successful paper. Times have sure changed.

9AM (1):


-         The Texas Rangers now have a special place in their stadium that sells food made just like the kind found at the Texas State Fair. Maybe the Astros should take a hint and do something like this at Minute Maid.

-         Irony alert: Sean Penn’s entire career has been based on gun violence. In real life, however, he wants more gun laws.

-         Celebrity Birthdays


9AM (2):


-         What possesses people to drive like the idiots that they do?

-         Which movies will open today? Titles include Divergent

 

9AM (3):


-         Microsoft has decided to phase out Internet Explorer. Who actually uses this browser anymore?

-         A pilot in Florida flew his airplane in the shape of a penis, which appeared on radar.

-         The Mars rover inadvertently roamed a path in the shape of a penis last year.

-         Prince Charles met with Barack the other day.

-         More than 50,000 people have signed a petition to block the appearance of Kanye West at the Glastonbury Music festival.

-         Emails


9AM (4):

 

-         Today is the vernal equinox.

-         Most apartments in New York feature windows that don’t open. This begs the question: How did Eric Clapton’s kid fall out of his 53rd story apartment?

-         5 teenagers stole the tip jar at a Dairy Queen in Detroit and then put it on social media. Naturally, they got caught.

 

 


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