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February 27th, 2015
Today ON WJ

5AM (1):

-         Do you ever wake up with a song in your head and have no idea how it got there?

-         Warren Buffett drinks 5 Coke’s a day

-         A Christian musician is accepting paychecks for the use of his song in the film 50 Shades of Grey

-         Kid Rock is a boob man, not an ass man. Thanks, Kid, we all needed to know.

5AM (2):

-         It will soon be a felony to possess ammunition for AR-15 assault rifles thanks to Obama.

 

6AM (1):

-         Ted Cruz has the propensity to get too preachy when he speaks.

-         We need a reverse-the-revolution kind of revolution in politics right now.

-         Big anticipation for the appearance of Rick Perry’s glasses today.

-         Maybe 2016 is the year for a short, pit-bull-esque kind of president.

6AM (2):

-         Sad news: The Kardashians have signed a $100 million television deal.

-         Parody: Is this what every bro country song sounds like?

-         If you watch the TV show Nashville, you’ll get a peek into the ‘bro country’ world

6AM (3):

-         Net Neutrality has passed, but we still don’t know what’s in it. Remind you of anything?

6AM (4):

-         Parody: It’s up to the government to decide whether or not you can alter the speed of your data.

-         Turns out you’ve been cooking your pasta wrong all these years.

7AM (1)

-         5 Random Facts

-         A black basketball icon has died.

-         Who knew that there was a time when the NBA had no black basketball players?

-         It’s only right that white folks can’t have their own history month.

-         Brace yourself: KFC has decided to sell the world’s first edible coffee cup

-         Parody: What other edible products will KFC sell?

7AM (2):

-         America’s attention was captured by two llamas on the loose in Arizona yesterday. Was it any coincidence that more attention was paid to the black llama?

-         Jorge, the climate-supporting civil engineer wrote the show yesterday to further defend his position after calling in to the show.

-         ISIS, like the animals they are, flooded a museum and destroyed priceless ancient artifacts.

7AM (3):

-         How much money has Hillary really stashed away over the years under the guise of the ‘Clinton Foundation?’

-         Parody: America needs Putin, so stop acting like a little girl!

-         Calls

7AM (4):

-         Humans are supposed to eat meat and vegetables.

-         Calls

8AM (1):

-         Adrian Peterson wants to be traded to the Dallas Cowboys.

-         What would you do if you woke up after being drugged and your testicles had been removed?

8AM (2):

-         Officially there are three more weeks of winter.

-         Parody: How does Gandalf feel about weather?

-         Parody: Ozzy Osbourne wants winter to f*ck off!

8AM (3):

-         Has Pat Robertson ever addressed the issue of tramp stamps?

-         Audio: Pat Robertson sounds off about posting ultrasound photos to social media.

-         The ‘architects’ of the W&J app are not doing their job.

-         Calls – Are there any demons in the money that Pat Robertson gets?

8AM (4):

-         9 people were found dead in Missouri, but no one knows how any of the victims died.

-         Missouri has a Texas County and a newspaper with the name Houston in it.

-         Audio: How does Pat Robertson feel about tattoos?

-         As a supplement to the Net Neutrality verdict, W&J have taken a motion to memorize the Internet and provide you with a low cost Google alternative.

-         The consensus is in: Everyone loves the audio of the Slingblade impersonator driving through Starbucks.

9AM (1):

-         Is the dress blue and black or white and gold? A photo of a dress has been circulating the Internet, leaving people puzzled as to its color.

-         Celebrity Birthdays

-         Barack has trouble understanding what a ‘surprise attack’ really is.

-         What would General Patton have thought about Obama?

9AM (2):

-         This day in history

9AM (3):

-         Calls – Is it racist to think a black golden doodle would be faster than the other dogs?

-         How much does Matthew McConaughey charge to do appearances?

9AM (4):

-         Is it acceptable to withhold a tip at a restaurant just because you served in the military?

 

 

 

 


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